Bipolar – I conquered it

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Bipolar – A disease I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy

As I write this I am not sure I will publish it because once people know you have bipolar they generally run a mile, and very fast. It is the minority that actually try help and understand.

For me I was first diagnosed probably 20 years ago. It took me a lot of counselling plus medications to stabalise my head. Over the years my issues have driven many friends away but those that stuck have become life long friends.

My clients never see the downside. They only ever see me riding a high, giving my all. In my advertising days I was always head hunted. Only ever applied for one job. My very first job at just 15 years of age. In tourism as a tour guide, clients see me as an extremely positive guide full of energy, full of drive, and full of information. From my 8 years or so in tourism I have a worldwide network of friends from all different nationalities. They just never see the crash that may come after they have left.

I believe I have learnt to conquer the bipolar and have done it very well. Its years since I have suffered the suicidal thoughts. The highs I love. Its like I am on fire and I can do anything, and generally I can.

I now a days understand why I was head hunted for jobs. I was good, very good in fact at what I do. It is those highs the bipolar person loves.

I have known people to knock off their medications because they had big projects on and needed the high that the average person never experiences. On a high we are brilliant. Unfortunately after the high often comes a crash.

This week Xiaoli, my boss, my wife has upset me and I cant seem to shake it. A trivial issue which a bipolar sufferer can blow out of proportion. This week not helped by the fact Xiaoli is still in China completing business meetings we both set up. She is my shoulder I lean on. Very heavily at times.

Does she understand the disease. Probably not. Just knows I am the person she absolutely loves that has these weird times where negativity sets in. And no one except myself can get me out again. And she knows she is the only person that I will let my defences down with which in turn enables me to conquer the bipolar demons.

I have been off medications for a number of years now initially against doctors advice but my doctor agrees, I own the disease now, it no longer owns me. What got me to this point. A lot of counselling that delved deeply into my past. Helped me understand why I was always head hunted for jobs. Helped me understand I am bordering on brilliant and not a failure in life. And lastly those friends that stuck with me through black and blue. Never judged me

I understand now I am really good at whatever I do. I never understood that before. Just only ever chose to hear the negative comments. And that reason goes right back to childhood.

My doctor holds me up as an example of the way a bipolar sufferer can conquer the disease which will really never go away. Not sure I like being put on that pedastool.

For a sufferer to conquer bipolar or even depression, they must first admit they have a problem and need help. Until they do that they will never get on the road to recovery. And don’t be afraid to hold your hand up and say I am a sufferer. If friends or family run a mile, and some will, then those are the ones you do not need around you on your road back to good health.

 

This is a Jeep, or is it?

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This is a Jeep, or is it?

A very good friend of mine in China recently bought a yellow one of these. About 160,000 YUAN which New Zealand dollars is roughly just over $30,000. Now if we could buy a Jeep that price New Zealand we would be ecstatic. But is it a Jeep really?

The answer to that it is a Jeep in badge and maybe design but it stops there. Componentry and running gear is Italian (Fiat) designed and the end product is manufactured in  Guangzhou, Southern China.

A beautiful vehicle as I road in it. Luxurious décor. Leather upholstery. All the mod cons but unlike Jeep in the western world missing for Jeep one important feature. Four wheel drive.

So yes a badge says Jeep. Design infers Jeep but that is the end. It is a Fiat maybe. But it looks great, seemed to drive well on city streets in Nanning when I was there.

Isnt it a pity that name manufacturers like Jeep let their product be changed to something else. Weakening the image of Jeep. Or do they just turn a blind eye that’s it in China so wont affect other markets.

If I lived China I guess I would be very happy to own one but I just think it’s a shame to see this happen to what is perceived to be a good brand.

My brother in law had also bought a new vehicle. A Suzuki. I wonder now if that was also something else under the bonnet?

http://www.peterandxiaoli.com

 

Still a work in progress

A steady work in progress!

I have just completed a trip to China I judged as being successful albeit we are yet to see business from it. That may yet take another trip over there as Chinese in business are quite different to our kiwi culture and business does not happen overnight. I knew that when deciding to target the Chinese to help with growth in our tourism business. I always maintained it was a three stage process. Plus add to that we are a small family company and do not do packaged tours.

  • Stage one establish contact and a form of relationship that will enable us to get the appointment.
  • Stage two travel over there for the appointments made
  • Stage three follow those appointments up. Answer questions/queries made then consider yet another trip.

This week I have spent following up with yet more work to be done. A couple of meetings to do here in New Zealand that form part of the answers asked for. A slow but steady work in progress.

Xiaoli had 2 more meetings in China after I departed. The first a meeting of her doing that I am hesitant about saying it is the type of business we want. I know she will have success as the company concerned has already travelled to New Zealand to meet us. Documents have been signed. Memorandums of understanding between our companies. One document not my doing but in Chinese prepared by Xiaoli. I guess part of our business is going to take a change in direction. Change may not be the word. Our business may grow another wing.

One more meeting after that to complete for Xiaoli. A travel consultant. A meeting I arranged and we are already well advanced with. My comfort zone. Tourism.  A meeting I could not stay for due to work pressures and farm commitments back in New Zealand.

Today is Saturday. I am going to take a few hours off. My present from China, a drone. And I need learn fly it so I can take aerial photographs over some of our beautiful countryside.

New Zealand has once again been judged second most peaceful country in the world with only Iceland beating us. And given our much larger land base than Iceland that is a significant achievement. But a regular feat year after year. A reason if you have not been to New Zealand, then you need come.

Whenever I travel abroad, I am so happy to be home. In coming months I have two long 20 days tours booked out of England. My specialty, sightseeing/photography tours. I love showing people New Zealand. These tours start Auckland and end in Christchurch. They will see a diverse landscape changing daily as we head south as far as Milford Sound before heading north to finish in Christchurch.

I love the summer tour season. I miss out on my fishing but who could complain when you are driving New Zealand, the second most peaceful country in the world. And probably the most beautiful

http://www.peterandxiaoli.com

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A blog that has become provocative I wrote on Facebook

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This blog was written for Facebook

I share this blog with my readers because it’s a blog I wrote on my facebook page and achieved record readers. Now that I didn’t expect. I wrote it from the heart and is genuinely the way I feel. Of my 3800+ so called friends on facebook, most are just wanting to be friends for friends sake.

Read it, see what you think. Did I write it wrong? One comment thought I did a really good promotion for business. Where the heck did he get that impression from? Here it is exactly as published.

This is to my many (3800+) facebook friends

Yes, we have over 3,800 so called Facebook friends. They approach us, we do not approach them, at a rate of about 15 per day.
Early times we started with the woman seeking men, mainly from the Phillipines. We seemed to have progressed past them thank goodness as for us Facebook we use to publish our tour blogs. Blogs we enjoy writing plus sharing our many beautiful photographs from places we are fortunate enough to travel because of being in tourism.
About the same time as the single woman were contacting us we were hounded by the spammers, strippers and the list goes on. The latest seems to be the ‘motivational speaker’ type people.
I hoped those that contact us genuinely read our facebook site because it is an open site and were interested in reading our blogs or just looking at the photographs. Other blog sites, one in particular our followers are growing on rapidly, but they follow us because they obviously enjoy what we post. And its as simple as that
Right now I have just returned from a business trip in China and are full on doing pricing and quotes requested on that trip. But when that is complete I am going to purge our friend list. If all 3800+ were reading our blogs it would show up in the likes etc. So I am going to look at the friends list and delete those I never see show up on our likes. Those who I have no idea why they wish to be friends with us.
Facebook I believe allow up to 5000 friends. We are heading that direction although I do not accept now all those that approach us. I am happier to have less so called friends but those that genuinely are interested in our blogs or photographs.
We don’t ask you to give us business. Our business seems to coast along just fine. For us it’s a hobby to write the blogs. Taking photographs I love and I love to share them as I know a lot of people will never get to see what we do.
We don’t ask you to ‘like’ our page. Just enjoy it.
If you message us and ask where we are from well we are not going to respond. Why would we? On our page its very clear where we are from, what we do, our marital status etc. So think before you message.

http://www.peterandxiaoli.com

China – My lost photographs

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My wow factor in my 6 day China trip

I thought I had mislaid these photographs when I wrote my last blog. I spent the next half day worrying as to whether I had deleted them by accident. I went to be stressing over them as this temple was my wow factor for the sightseeing part of last weeks trip to China.

My last blog I stated Suzhou about 2 hours out of Shanghai got to me in a very beautiful way. The fourth trip for me to China and each time something gives me that real buzz factor. The Hanshan Temple and complex in Suzhou blew me away. Other parts of Suzhou were not far behind either. I so wish this trip had been longer with more time for sightseeing. Instead each stop was done on a restricted time basis as we tried see as much as possible.

Suzhou is a must for me to visit again. But next time more than just over a day like I had this time. I believe given what I saw very fast then next time I need allocate 3 to 4 days minimum in and around Suzhou.

The temples, yes more than one, were beautiful that we visited. Walking around the lake at night, albeit we only did a small part, was stunning. That lake could be a day in itself. The old China areas as I call them were stunning yet for us just quick walks through.

Its funny, but the past trips I avoided flying into Shanghai. Very nearly didn’t do it this trip. So very glad I did.

My next plan, establish a China tour for Kiwi’s and others hosted by myself and Xiaoli. So you have the best of both. A kiwi host with Chinese hostess that can talk the lingo that ensures we get to see the best things. I believe we can do it at a more favourable rate than most tours I see advertised and often avoid the typical tourist routes. Through having Chinese family I have seen parts of China and its treasures that most westerners wouldn’t even know existed.

Not sure when my next trip to China is. Gut feel says within the year for business reasons but if it is then I will find more time to visit other provinces I have not yet seen and there are a lot.  I am jealous of Xiaoli and her friend Jen, they are still in China. Today if memory is right they are off to Weihai. That is business orientated but after that Chongqing which partially is also business with a meeting I arranged for Xiaoli to do in my absence, but 2 days exploring. And I know for a fact there is a very special temple in that region.

I love China but I also do love being home in New Zealand

http://www.peterandxiaoli.com

China – My 8 day trip

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My 6 days China last week.

Was there a highlight? Yes but not just one.

Xiaoli’s family grinning ear to ear when they saw me. 5 years since my last visit. It used to be a 2 yearly trip but health dragged the time out since last visit. I have promised it wont be 5 years again but we will get back to 2 yearly visits.

Business success. Better than I could have hoped for. At least one travel consultant looking like marketing our tours. I had just been happy if it was just a meet and greet but we got further. Very pleasing but then we did present ourselves very well with the book we gave detailing us and tours.

I know another trip will be required before some we presented to will start looking at giving us business. Its just the Chinese way of getting to know you first. I was impressed with the indepth knowledge of our country some had.

The ‘old China’ as I refer it. The temples, the old streets and houses. I was blown away in particular, Suzhou, 2 hours from Shanghai. My wish list every visit is to see ‘old China’. I was not disappointed.

So not just one highlight but many. But then it was just a 6 day trip with a lot crammed into it.

I took many photos. I do wish in hindsight I had taken my big camera instead of the 2 smaller ones I packed. But I never expected to see what I did with the help of family and friends. But I still have some great photographs and some areas like Suzhou I will visit again. Just at a slower pace so its not a rush rush trip. I highly recommend Suzhou if like me you are into the temples etc. A lot of heritage in that area. Great food to.

It is no secret I am intrigued with Buddhism. The more I learn the more I feel I have to learn of Buddhism. It fascinates me. The vegetarian food part I cant get into although they do make some rather delicious vegetarian dishes. But I own up to being a carnivore who craves meat.

We saw temples dating well back into history. My eyes were just popping open with every new thing I saw. And to think all this goes back over a thousand years.

It was good to see a lot of restoration work going on and hear that China is now protecting its past. No longer allowing the destroying of this magnificent heritage they have.

Enjoy my photos. Ignore the brown water you see in some. It is the rainy season there with typhoons so the water colour just reflects the ongoing floods in different regions they have been having. The photos I really wanted to share I cannot find. May still be on the camera

Tomorrow is a day out on the boat with my mate fishing. Doubtless Bay area is on the agenda.

http://www.peterandxiaoli.com

 

 

 

China – No google, no facebook! Sad

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About 9 days of no blogs

Blame China Government. No google and no facebook. I could get a few blog sights but decided as I hadn’t loaded VPN to get around the block, blog could wait until I get home. So blogs I post this week are one week late being posted.

Landed back in New Zealand from Shanghai 5.40am this morning. Delivered some items I was bringing back from China for a few Chinese friends then did the long drive home. Arriving I guess somewhere after 1pm.

Am I exhausted you ask? Absolutely out on my feet. A friend wanted me to have a sleep Auckland then have lunch with her before I did the drive home. I opted to make the drive home while I still felt I could handle the 4.5 hours.

Xiaoli’s son had been babysitting the farm in my absence so we met halfway for a catch up as he headed south back to Auckland and I headed home. He bought my beautiful little dog Li Li with him as a surprise for me. That wagging tail was a delight to see.

I love China but just 6 nights and days is not enough when you need travel 3 different provinces for meetings. Family were very happy to see Xiaoli and I arrive. Xiaoli having gotten to China a week and a half before me but waited for the family catch up until I arrived. There were big smiles all round. Really quite emotional for all of us. I guess 3 years since they had seen Xiaoli and 5 years since I was there.

My brother in law exchanged gifts with me but his far out shone mine although so I felt. But his delight at the offcuts of greenstone blew him away as he wasn’t expecting that and has recently started jewellery making. Thanks to my cousin Anne in Hokitika helping obtain the greenstone off cuts for me.

I know you are wondering what he gave me. A drone with 12 megapixel camera. That blew me away. Xiaoli had told me some time ago she didn’t want me to have one but as her brother and I often talk on wechat he knew my wish but I had not expected that from him. It still sits packaged up. Need catch up on sleep and be properly awake so I can absorb the instructions on how to fly and how to make the camera work.

Was the trip a success. 100%. A happy family who only saw us for 36 hours. But then some very good meetings. One in particular. Xiaoli had to do the presentation where there was minimal English spoken but I did those with a good grasp of English. One particular meeting looking very likely we should gain business assuming I do the costings right. Those I need supply later this week.

I had prepared and had translated a 40 page document. With the help of a facebook friend in Nanning, China, I found a competent printer. He tidied up my art and printed as bound books for us. They looked extremely professional. All my hard work over recent months in preparation then seeing the end product, I was astounded. And being finished in China dramatically reduced the costs.

An early night tonight. Have a full on week. A week only able to read emails on the cell as that could access google. So that was frustrating. For some reason several videos have dropped off, or link has gone corrupt on our website. A mystery but I need resolve that. Was working well when I went away.

I will not do another trip like that again. To tiring. Need longer spell China and less internal travel.

www.peterandxiaoli.com

 

 

New Zealand to China in 40 hours

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This blog seems difficult to write

I must be tired I guess.

Departed Ninety Mile Beach in the far north of New Zealand midday on the 26th. It is now midday on the 27th as I write this and now I sit killing 8 hours in the Pudong Airport, Shanghai waiting the internal flight to Nanning Guangxi.

An uneventful drive through to Auckland. Tossed the coin in my head as to which vehicle I would take to Auckland. I ruled out my 4wd as I had taken that 60km up the beach on Friday. And right now our beautiful Ninety Mile Beach is extremely rich in plankton which to the uneducated looks like mud on the beach. Plankton adheres itself well to vehicles and stinks terribly. Plus we caught fish so my 4wd was ruled out on smell.

Xiaoli’s 4wd which is somewhat cleaner I ruled out as my step son babysitting the faerm in my absence needs something easy to drive for him if he decides to go to the beach fishing.

That left our 12 seat tour vehicle. An overkill for one person with one case and a large box but so be it. The 5 hour drive I only stopped once to buy some cone honey as I felt my in laws may not have experienced. Hoping it has travelled well. I guess I will find out tonight when I get to my end destination and unpack my case.

Being early to the Auckland International Airport I managed to catch live the second half of the All Blacks versus Wallabies rugby international. A nail biting affair but we did come out winners once again.

The flight to Shanghai was slightly shorter than predicted at 1 hour 45 minutes although I believe we took another 30 minutes crossing the tarmac. The plane stopped out on the tarmac so we needed depart the plane on to the tarmac and board a bus where we were squeezed in like sardines.

The customs area was the first of the very long queues. By now my feet killing me. I had got some sleep on the plane thanks to a few magic pills the doctor supplied with me with.

A lengthy walk from international to terminal one where Shanghai Airlines domestic flights leave. My second piece of luggage, my box of milk powder and honey Xiaoli requested I bring I needed carry. It only weighed 15kg but I had a large case with no handle to pull it, plus my computer case. I was exhausted just getting one terminal to another.

The queue at the domestic check in was worse than the customs one had been. It was unbelievable and terribly slow. No other westerners now in sight which gives me an advantage as with my height I see over most. Limited English now being spoken.

Got a window seat for the 3 hour internal flight. Hopefully I can just sleep. In New Zealand time its nearing 4pm. Minimal proper sleep and carting luggage around is starting to take its toll.

Only 3 more hours to kill in the Shanghai Airlines domestic terminal, then I can start the next stage of the trip. Obviously where I head is not popular with westerners as no others in sight but I know that from past trips. The kids stare and point at me. I try smile which seems to embarrass them when they realise they are caught out.

I am tired. Not sure when I will get to post this blog but I will date it and time it as I write. Not even sure tonight I will have internet for the computer. I know data is working on the cell but rates for 2 Degrees are astronomical so the less I use the phone, the better.

An udon noodle dish with beef for lunch. It was okay. Only mildly spicy. I would give it a pass for airport food. But the coffee I wanted with it well below par. If I had been New Zealand I would have said try again but in airports you don’t have great choice.

123 Yuan which equates to about $25 New Zealand on the expensive side but if you are biding time in an airport then you cannot be fussy. Once I hit Nanning tonight the boss (Xiaoli) can take over finances. It is her birth country after all.

Whats on the shopping list trip before we get into the business part of the trip. New clothes which I hope Xiaoli has already made good inroads buying. I only have what I wore over. I was going to get a drone but the boss put a firm no on that when I bought it up before. Hoping my brother in law will help with my argument tomorrow for purchase. He like me likes photography.

Nothing else on the buy list. Don’t need for anything really so clothes will do. And we are in the provinces which have all the clothing factories.

Must be a plane departing soon. Seats are filling up around me. Unfortunately not my plane as boarding is still 3 hours away.

Its 9.40pm New Zealand time so 5.4opm China time. The stewardess just told me 1 hour to go. When I land Nanning it will be 37 hours since I departed Ninety Mile Beach. And I may be wrong  but I believe still an hour and a half to go by car to Fusai.

I am exhausted and that’s putting it mildly. My feet are swelling and very sore but given I have had the same socks and shoes on for 36 hours now probably better I leave them on. Haha

My rear end hurts. The seats on Shanghai Airlines seem the most uncomfortable so far but reality is the tenderness is more likely to do with the number of hours I have been seated in planes and terminals.

I hope family don’t expect me to eat much tonight as it seems the airlines keep plying you with food. And right now I am food out so to speak.

My throat is dry as there is never enough fluid supplied. Just half full plastic cups.

Shanghai Airlines keep announcing turbulence and please remain seated yet the turbulence I feel is nothing to what we had at times on the long haul Air New Zealand flight for 12.5 hours last night.

I just want to lay my head down, close the eyes and let there be quiet like we have on our farm back home. Instead there is the ongoing droning of the jet engines. The many people talking and the announcer seems to be forever making announcements. I am the only non Chinese aboard so they obviously feel just for me the announcement in Chinese each time, must be followed up in English.

I am tired. Really tired.

I am sure I will need delay posting these blogs certainly for facebook, until I get home. Not sure my mate loaded VPN software so I could get around the China block. Well I will find out tonight.

Not many photos yet as I have not been outside a plane or a terminal. Bugger. Tomorrow maybe although I know Xiaoli’s family are converging on Fusai for a family reunion in honour of Xiaoli and I returning for a visit. It will be the first full family photos since were taken when I first met Xiaoli’s family in December 2008.

We have all changed I am sure. 5 years since I last saw most of the family. 3 years for Xiaoli

http://www.peterandxiaoli.com

 

 

 

China tomorrow, fishing today

China tomorrow, but first a little fishing today

A drive 60km up Ninety Mile Beach, far north New Zealand. Its winter but somewhere out there in the Tasman Sea are the elusive Snapper. Unfortunately they remain elusive with just 6 caught.  But enough for a feed for the 3 of us.

Unfortunately a few sharks decided they wanted to come see who is on the other end of the line. Broke a number of hooks off and the few we did pull in were promptly sent on their way back to sea. I detest people that haul in sharks and leave them on the beach. If you don’t want to fillet and eat them, then gently take them off the hook and let them go back to sea. They are just part of the ecological chain.

Tomorrow the long drive to Auckland then board the plane to Shanghai. A long flight but I requested the exit row seat with more leg room. An 8 hour stopover in Shanghai (Pudong Airport) but I am sure time will just fly. Excuse the pun. Then the internal leg to Nanning where I hope my brother in law will be waiting. Maybe even my boss, Xiaoli. She has been over there a week and a half now. The farm seems empty/quiet without her. The dogs I know all sense it’s a little different.

So early night tonight. By the time I come back in 8 days the Snapper should be coming closer to shore as the waters warm. That’s the theory anyway

www.peterandxiaoli.com

Sunsets – Love them

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Sunsets – Don’t you love them

Tonight because my boss (Xiaoli – the wife) is away in China I have time to dwell on thoughts. Nothing in particular.

I had finished feeding the very numerous numbers of chooks and geese and wandering back to the house I couldn’t help but notice the very beautiful sunset.

Here in the far north of New Zealand we are spoilt with the fabulous sunsets we get to experience. This one was from our farm but from our beach accommodation overlooking Ninety Mile Beach they are even more startling as you watch the sun set over the ocean.

I never tire of them. Don’t often photograph them now as I have literally hundreds of sunset photographs but not 2 are ever the same. Just magnificent.

Saturday evening I fly off to China for a week. Mostly business but a family reunion with all Xiaoli’s family. They haven’t seen me for 5 years and Xiaoli 3 years.

Last time I went to China I weighed 120kg and had hair halfway down my back. You read right. When I retired from advertising agencies aged 54 I vowed to grow my hair long again. When I was about 24 I was offered an extremely senior position in an agency that was later to become Saatchi and Saatchi. Our Managing Director of the time put one condition on the offer, the hair must go short and I need wear suits. 3 piece suits would you believe.

I vowed that day that yes I would accept the job and the conditions that went with it but the day I got out of advertising I would grow the hair long once again. And I did. Halfway down my back plus for a while, a beard as well. Yes back to hippy days because I guess nobody could tell me not to. I didn’t enjoy the beard so that went but not the long hair.

So now my in laws will see me at about 85kg weight and extremely short hair. 2 major unexpected stomach operations. The later almost claiming my life. The hair when sick was falling out in clumps, and no, I did not have chemo. So told Xiaoli, shave it all off and every 3 weeks since I continue to shave it. If I cant have it long then better very short.

The weight loss, a very rare side effect of what they did but healthy I am except for ongoing side effects that may never go away.

So Xiaoli’s family by now possibly know the hair is short but not sure they know the 35kg weight loss.

So tonight I photographed the sunset because I guess I was reliving memories of the past and thinking about China. Xiaoli married me about 9 years ago, very overweight and yes the long hair. And I always remember the initial period when she would just watch in amazement at the sunsetting from our lounge window overlooking the Tasman Sea.

I have not yet witnessed a sunset in China. Guessing they are not often seen

http://www.peterandxiaoli.com

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